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July 18, 2008
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Black hours, blacker desires, fog like smoke encircling auburn hair
Dark eyes lined darker, heels tap out the same every night message in the air
‘I don’t care.’
‘I don’t care.’
‘I don’t care.’
Neon sign blinks on and off, she is like a moth to a flame to it drawn.
Old dark door opens with a shove; black stocking covered legs lead her on
“Give me the usual escape.’
‘Give me the usual that makes my throat grates.’
‘Give me the usual, it is what it takes.’
Sliding on the stool, black satin whispers on silk hidden well under
Whisper of one leg, caress as it crosses ore the other, lighter flicks, no cigarette, one wonders.
‘Slow tonight, not many here.’
“Slow tonight, the way I prefer.’
‘Slow tonight, but it is smoky, good deal.’
Swish of a glass on a slick bar top, sliding of a shot ends in her fingertips.
Wrapping around it she smiles, as she pulls on the cigar after cutting off the tip.
‘Nice blend, smooth, rich.’
‘Nice way it draws, sweet on my lips.’
“Nice way the end burns embers hot and rich.’
Scene is disturbed by the rush of dark night air that carries the alley’s scents
In he walks with the stride of knowing here he can find what he intends.
‘Buy you a drink?’
‘Lady like you shouldn’t alone and think.’
‘Come on honey, don’t away from me shrink.’
Dark eyes turn to meet his gaze, black is the soul that through them she him analyzes
Glass is brought and in one gulp emptied clean, her lips part, her voice is emotionless.
‘First of all you had the courtesy to ask.’
‘Second of all I don’t like men who don‘t take me to task.’
‘Third, from one glance, I can tell this night you wouldn’t last.’
The glass is set on the bar with a thud; she turns on the stool and stands to full height.
Laying a sawbuck on the bar, she nods to the bartender, he knows now she has no fright.
‘When you grow up and are a man I’ll be here.’
‘When from one glance I can tell you don’t anything fear.’
‘When I am sure that your words are your bond sincere.”
She strides to the door, jerks it open wide, her form is illuminated by the neon outside.
She steps back into the shadows of night; she turns towards him, a smile, nothing to hide.
‘Then you will be a man in my eyes.’
‘Then what you say would be carried inside me.'                                          
'Then you and I can relate, skin to skin, side to side.’
Black hours, blacker desires, fog like smoke encircling auburn hair
Dark eyes lined darker, heels tap out the same message in the same night air, save for one added line – till then, -
‘I don’t care.’
Door closes and she is lost to the night outside.
:iconaheartswhispers:
sometimes empty is best

ps - had to edit some changes - long day and posted in early morning hours - but tiredness was well earned and day well spent.
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:iconnormal-user:
nice - has a film noir kind of feel
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:iconaheartswhispers:
:floating:Thank you so much for your kind comment. I have been trying to edit a few mistakes in grammar but DA is being stubborn! Thank you again. :floating:

Vic
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:iconyourpleasantdarkness:
Beautiful imagery and wonderful rhyme-scheme with a good pace. :lol: Your work is splendid.

-A.C.
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:iconaheartswhispers:
:flirty:You are most kind! Your work is amazing!
Vic
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:iconaheartswhispers:
:peace: Thank you, I am trying to get some minor edits in grammer and add a few lines that I feel necessary, but DA is being nasty about editing and it is taking forever to process changes. And when I hit save? It saves my comments but not the additions and changes to the work. If push comes to shove, I will maybe have to delete it and add it in an edited form. But today I am exhausted - we worked hard yesterday but it is working! So I am jazzed or should I say 'lifted' (LOL). :peace:Thank you again for your kind comments and your fav! :peace:

Thanks!

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:iconwizillusions:
*wizillusions Jul 19, 2008  Hobbyist Writer
Well written, captures one attention from the opening line. :+fav:

Lines that I found most captivating:

Black hours, blacker desires, fog like smoke encircling auburn hair

she is like a moth to a flame to it drawn

black is the soul that through them she him analyzes
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:iconaheartswhispers:
:flirty:Thank you, thank you, it is most appreciated! :flirty:

Vic
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